Update on Feelings

I walked out of therapy thinking this wasn't an epiphany day, but something the counselor said stuck with me. He said i needed to focus more on how I feel and what I want instead of what I should be doing and what other people want. Let's try to be honest now:

I feel like Jason and I were ultimately not right for each other. Being together would just be forcing something that was not working. I shouldn't be in a relationship and I cannot even imagine when I will be in a state of mind to be. I think Jason had a good grasp of this situation, when he said that we shouldn't be together unless I can think that I deserve to be with him. The counselor suggested I vocalize this with Jason, but I guess him being able to read this is like me telling him. It isn't the time for us to talk yet. I'm not sure when that will be, but things are starting to get more clear.

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8:09 PM
Every time I write something like this, i start to regret saying it. I start processing trying to figure out if this is true or not. It's still like something is missing in my life and that was Jason. I lost something very important. I guess this is not going back on saying we shouldn't be together.